When I walked into Rosie's Flower and Plant Boutique on Ayers Street, a few miles from Seaside Memorial Park, I had already made up my mind.  I was going to lay white roses, Selena's favorite flower, on her grave.  Nothing less would do. With Selena's blessings continuing (the sun was shining, though it was quite breezy), I was able to get the shop's last five white roses.  They then created a custom bouquet and placed it into a heavy ceramic container to withstand the constant Corpus Christi seabreeze. After I had paid for everything, I drove to a nearby Eckerd Drug Store and bought a card and black Sharpie pen.  I then carefully wrote out the message and set out for the cemetery. It was a somber moment as I laid the flowers and card on Selena's grave.  As I said several prayers while reflecting on Selena's life, I again found myself wishing that the stark reality of 1995 had just been a bad nightmare.   I was also grateful that I had the opportunity to pay tribute, not only for myself, but for all Selena fans, especially those who might never have the chance to visit Corpus Christi. As I took a few photos, I couldn't help but notice how amazingly life-like the bronze engraving of Selena's face which lay over her tomb was.  It looked natural and beautiful, bringing out Selena's caring and gifted persona.  It was like looking into the face of an angel.

When I left on my flight to Texas, I was thoroughly tired and not feeling very well.  I was exhausted from staying up until the wee hours of the morning, cleaning out a virus from my computer.  Though my intentions had been to get several extra hours of sleep, the unwelcome message, "Driver Memory Error:  Kagou-Anti-Kro$oft says not today!" put an end to my plans.  This was the "Kak virus" which infected computers without the presence of an e-mail attachment or the need to actually open an infected message.   It was also more of a nuisance than a lethal destructive worm; only effecting the start-up menu to automatically shutdown computers when clicking on "OK" in the box below the message on the first of every month from 5:01 PM to 12:00 Midnight.  It didn't destroy critical files.  Nevertheless, I couldn't go to bed until this virus had been completely eradicated from my computer.  To make matters worse, I had picked up a bad cold which turned to bronchitis. When my alarm clock went off at 3:00 AM (EDT), I immediately pressed the snooze button.  I did this for several 9 minute cycles, waiting until the absolute last moment to drag myself from the comfort of my bed.  It was close to 3:30 AM (EDT) when I finally got up. After showering, shaving, and doing some last minute packing, I headed for LaGuardia Airport.  It was 4:50 AM (EDT). Things got progressively better after I boarded my flight (Delta Flight 527) for Dallas.  I got close to three hours of sleep, passing the time more quickly.  Next, my connecting flight (Delta Flight 1729) arrived 15 minutes early in San Antonio. The San Antonio warmth was a welcome relief from the airline's chill (possibly due to the A/C being on too high, but more likely because I wasn't feeling well).  My check-in suitcase came out #4 on the conveyor belt (a first!!! -- usually it's among the last pieces out) and there was no line at AVIS Car Rental! With everything now going so smoothly, I began to even feel better.  I then knew it was going to be a great Selena trip! While enjoying the beautiful Texas floral scenery as I headed down 281/37 South to Corpus Christi, I thought how nice it would be if the radio played some of Selena's music.  Although I had brought a tape of many of Selena's famous songs which I had compiled, I couldn't play it.  My rental car was only equipped with a CD player. "Techno Cumbia" began playing on 99.9 KSAB when I was about half-ways to Corpus Christi.  It was incredible how the day was getting better! I reached Corpus Christi at about 1:30 PM (CDT), 1 1/2 hours ahead of the goal I had set for myself.  My objective had been to reach Corpus Christi by 3:00 PM (CDT) to ensure I had time to visit the Selena Museum, which closed at 5:00 PM (CDT).  With the Museum being closed on weekends, and Friday being the only weekday that I would be in Corpus Christi, this was my only chance to visit it.  I was required to be in San Antonio Sunday evening through the remainder of my trip for a job-related seminar which my Company had already paid for. It was also because of this seminar that I didn't have to pay for my airfare and car rental. When I arrived to Corpus Christi, I got off exit 3A and checked in at the Days Inn on 901 Navigation Boulevard.  I was eager to get rid of my luggage so that I could take in the Selena sites unencumbered. Although this was the same Days Inn where Selena had been shot on that fateful March 31st, 1995 day, all remnants of this terrible tragedy had been removed.  There were no flowers, no cards, no graffiti messages of condolences and love, no Room 158, and no Selena fans.  Number 158 had been purged along with all other even numbers as new odd numbers were assigned to each room.  To discourage inquiries and visits by Selena fans, Days Inn now established a policy against disclosing information about Room 158 and posted two signs reading, "Only registered guests beyond this point" at the start of both driveways leading to the back of the hotel from the Registration Office.  This was the same Registration Office where that infamous 911 call had been made after Selena had stumbled  through the door and collapsed, bleeding on the floor.

Selena Remembered

Copyright 2000 -- All Rights Reserved; No Part may be duplicated without permission from MOCKBA1 except the Selena Sites photos which have been given to the public domain.  Selena Photo between White Roses is property of EMI-Latin.  Background designed by MOCKBA1.  For Permission to use, contact MOCKBA1.

June 2, 2000:

With no chance of discovering the exact location of Room 158, I could only visualize how Selena, then mortally wounded, had run across the parking lot from behind the hotel with her killer in pursuit.  I could again feel the anger as the terrible events came back to life.  Selena had been shot in the most cowardly way -- in the back!  I imagined what an effort it had been for Selena to make it to the Registration Office -- with the intense pain and substantial loss of blood.  I couldn't help but despair over how out of all places, the bullet had managed to find and sever an artery leaving her no chance.  How I wished the shooting had never occurred.  My heart grasped for some miraculous rolling back of time while reason knew the futility of it -- the past could never be relived.  If only Selena had still been alive... if only...  The magnitude of her loss hit as hard as when I first saw The New York Times article about Selena's death on April 1, 1995.  The numb shock returned as I thought about how needlessly Selena's voice had been silenced when her soul was torn from this world. In any event, Room 153 became my hotel room for the next three days.  It was conveniently close to the Q-Productions building which houses the Selena Museum.  In fact, with Q-Productions being only a couple of blocks away, it was within walking distance of the Days Inn. After I had dropped off my luggage, I drove to Q-Productions and requested a tour of the Selena Museum.  Although cameras weren't allowed in the Museum, consistent with policies at other sites owned and operated by the Quintanillas, I managed to strike a conversation with two Q-Productions employees who had recently visited New York.  Subsequently, I was permitted to take pictures in the Q-Productions offices, which included several Selena-related displays.

I then toured the Selena Museum.  I viewed her many awards, the outfits Selena had worn during key events of her life (e.g. The Grammy ceremonies, the Amor Prohibido photo shoot, etc.), family photos, her famous red Porsche, a life-size black electric guitar (near the Porsche), various Selena dolls and Hard Rock Cafe pins, SR No. 619 (Texas Senate Resolution paying tribute to Selena) and other memorabilia and personal effects.   I was most struck by the alabaster relief of Selena's face, fashion sketches (some signed) drawn by Selena when she was only 15, the slimness of her outfits (they were highly elastic I was told), and the almost countless number of awards and honors Selena had won for her talent and contributions to society.  Though I couldn't take pictures in the Museum, I was left with indelibly precious memories.  One such memory was of the message inscribed on a "Visionary Award" presented pothumously to Selena by 3M in 1997 for her "Dreaming of You" crossover album.  It  read:  "Surpassing the limits of artistic innovation."  These six simple words had perfectly and eloquently captured the magnitude of Selena's stardom. Following my tour, I bought a few Selena souvenirs at the gift shop.  I then took photos in the Q-Productions offices. As the day waned, I paid quick visits to Mirador de la Flor (a Selena Memorial erected along the waterfront on Shoreline Drive between Peoples St. and T-Head), the Selena Etc. boutique, and to Selena's grave in Seaside Memorial Park.  I only took a few photos since I planned longer visits for Saturday and Sunday, and to lay flowers on Selena's Grave on behalf of myself and all of her true fans, sites, and clubs.

June 3, 2000:

It was then off to Mirador de la Flor.  the life-sized Selena statue consisting of a guitar in her hair (which I only discovered after my photos were developed) and a microphone in her hand as she leaned against the large pillar was almost like seeing Selena in person has she paused between songs.  The magnificent white rose blooming out of the front of the pillar was a sight to behold.  The handpainted tiles that adorned the side and back walls of Mirador de la Flor were equally impressive, especially when taken into account that they had been painted by Texas school children who loved Selena. After completing my visit to Mirador de la Flor, I headed to Mexico.  I went to Matamoros and then returned briefly to the U.S. before crossing over the International Gateway Bridge to buy souvenirs for my brother and some friends.  It was a good thing that I left my luggage back at the Days Inn.  I accidentally entered Mexico through a "trucks only" lane, went through the red light when it failed to turn after several minutes and was pulled over by the Mexican Federal Police.  After inspecting my trunk, which undoubtedly would've taken a lot longer had I had luggage, they let me go. Upon my drive back to Corpus Christi, I ate at a Whataburger, one of Selena's favorite fast-food restaurants.  My Selena experience wouldn't have been complete without it.  A few days later, I ate a whole large-sized pepperoni pizza.  Pepperoni wasn't only my favorite topping, but one of Selena's favorite choices.

June 4, 2000:

By the time I had returned to my hotel room, Saturday had elapsed into Sunday.  By the end of Saturday, I had heard 5 Selena songs on the radio -- Techno Cumbia, La Carcacha, No Me Queda Mas, Amor Prohibido, and El Chico del Apartamento 512. A few hours later, around 5:00 AM (EDT), I went back out to take night photos of the Selena sites.   I took shots of Selena Etc. with its lit sign and of Mirador de la Flor, which looked impressive under the illuminated soft white lights.  I then drove around for a couple hours, listening to the radio which played La Carcacha and No Debes Jugar, waiting for sunrise.  Again more beauty, as the Mirador de la Flor's statue and white rose blended picturesquely with the brightening sky. After attending Mass at a small, local Catholic Church, I revisted Selena's grave for what I had planned to my my last time (10:00 AM-10:15 AM EDT).  As I reflected over Selena's life, again saying several prayers, I knew that she was with God and His angels in Heaven.  At the same time, I wished for a keepsake, not knowing if I would ever return to Corpus Christi.  Although there were ample, loose pebbles around Selena's grave, I chose not to take any, and returned to my hotel room.  I repacked my luggage and checked out, planning to head to San Antonio. Though I had every intention of leaving Corpus Christi, an inexplicable feeling drew me back to Selena's grave.  I felt in indescribable feeling that Selena was upset with me for not having taken the keepsake I had silently asked for.  For some reason, it seemed as if I had turned down her offer.  Then again, I've it's always been a lot easier for me to give than to receive. I returned back to Seaside Memorial Park and sat a little longer at Selena's grave.  During these moments I silently expressed my thoughts and said a few more prayers, and even neatened some of the floral tributes which had blown astray in the strong breeze. Once done, I took one small pebble that had drifted into nearby mud and put it into my pocket.  After quietly thanking Selena, I got into my rental car and started the engine.  It was 11:49 AM EDT and "Fotos Y Recuerdos" started playing.  It was like a validation of my feelings and a sign that Selena was happy that I had accepted her gift.

I then drove back to Mirador de la Flor for one last time.  After leaving a kiss for Selena's statue, I departed for San Antonio.  Coincidentally as I started the engine, "Si Una Vez," my favorite all-time song began playing, which put a fitting end to my Corpus Christi trip.  It was 12:13 PM EDT.  On the way back to San Antonio, I heard one last Selena song before 99.9 faded out -- "No Me Queda Mas."

Later June 4-9, 2000:

Although I was in San Antonio for a business seminar, Selena's presence remained.  I watched both showings of "Selena" and a special Selena excerpt on TNT on Sunday night.  The second showing ending early Monday morning.  A day later on Tuesday, I heard a tour boat operator ask his group, "how many of you have seen the movie 'Selena?'" as I crossed a bridge running over the San Antonio River from my hotel, La Mansion del Rio.  I was on my way to the nearby Presidio where my seminar was being held.  On Wednesday evening, a San Antonio radio station, 94.1 played "La Carcacha." Then on Thursday, June 8th, 2000, I came across a beautiful Selena display at Sam Goody's in the RiverCenter Mall, which I had to photograph.  I also discovered an older Selena CD "Recuerdos Y Exitos" which had a different cover than the one I had in New York, and two old Selena tapes:  "Selena" and "16 Exitos Originales!"  The CD sold for only $7.99 and the two tapes for only $9.99, which I immediately bought, especially since I never had the "16 Exitos Originales" tape. I left Texas on Friday.  Because of severe storms, my flight was changed from San Antonio to Dallas to New York to San Antonio to Atlanta to New York.  This got me home 1 1/2 hours earlier than I had planned!  When I returned to New York, I had brought back lasting Selena memories which I'll cherish for the remainder of my life.  I am grateful for having had the chance to visit Corpus Christi and most of all for having been able to pay her tribute on behalf of myself and others.  I'm sure that's what Selena would've done since she was always so open and accessible to her fans, friends, and family.  Perhaps that's the reason I was given a precious keepsake and had such a special Selena experience. Though gone, Selena still lives -- enjoying life to the fullest, singing with God's angels in Heaven.  Though the tears will never fully dry until we're all united in eternal bliss, Selena will be remembered always until that day.